February 27, 2006

Gay Agenda Revealed!

I know, I'm not supposed to go public with these sorts of tribal secrets, but nobody really reads my blog, so I figure it's probably okay.

Here's the short version, courtesy of Beth Quinn:

Be left alone and not get the crap beaten out of us.

Do normal things, like get married and raise kids.

Hold down a good job and have health insurance for the whole family.

Grow old together and develop a bit of a paunch or big butt from a few too many marvelous dinners.

Stop having whom we share our bed with be of any interest whatsoever to anyone.

Urge those lovable homophobic pseudo-Christians to discover Jesus' true message.

Works for me.

7 comments:

Chelle said...

The guys in the hexicles near me are now wondering why I'm laughing so hard!

Anonymous said...

if you don't want the public talking about who you share your bed with, then quit talking about!

Tracy said...

hey, Anonymous (how courageous of you to drop your littel bomb under the veil on anonymity) ...Go suck an egg. And while you're at it, try and get this: how about you quit talking about your partner, or wife, or husband, or vactaion with said person, or dinner out last week with said person, or your upcoming anniversary, celebrating your relationship with said person. Take all pictures of you and said lucky devil off your desk at work. Get 'em off your insurance, or you get off theirs. Don't bring the person to any parties or functions, and CERTAINLY don't become parents together! Try having to deny this person in public -- enlessly. When you have done that, you'll perhaps begin to know what it means to "quit talking about it." (Only you forgot to type the word "it" because you were in too much of a hurry to stick your nice, pinheaded, hateful 2 cents in.) I'm straight, by the way, and you and your holy cronies really give the rest of us a bad name. So while you're sucking the egg? Could you please refrain from sharing any more redneck pearls of wisdom? I love the internet; if this message had required a typewriter or a pen, I wouldn't have wasted the ink on you.

Tracy said...

P.S. Hey, Shelley... great title for your post; really brings the worms seeking a way to be STUPID out from under their rocks.

Chelle said...

I'm not sure why I initially laughed at this post. The truth of the matter is that there is nothing funny about this. It is deadly serious, and what we are looking for in our lives. Thanks for posting it. Love ya.

chimchim said...

How sweet it is to be on he side of reason and light. Love you for being you.

Anonymous said...

Jesus' true message???