Yo, Moms, listen up!

Okay, here's the thing.

I am working on an advanced degree in bedtime delayal. (I'm aware that delayal is not a word, but whatever, I'm not even five yet, you know what I mean, so go with it, will ya?)

To date, my techniques include, but are by no means limited to:

• profess an inability to select the books which shall be read
• brush teeth one at a time
• agonize over pajama choice
• discover that legs are too tired to ascend stairs
• realize that starvation is imminent
• want water, but also want not to get out of bed to get it
• belatedly discover that yes, I do need to use the bathroom again
• spook myself by staring deeply into the well-known shadows of my room

On a good night, diligent application of these techniques can buy me up to half an hour. And I think we all have an understanding of the situation.

BUT.

If, in the course of this little dance, I seem particularly tenacious, inventive, and fractious, if in fact I seem very close to completely melting down into a sobbing heap of pure misery, might it not occur to you that there is something special going on?

You blew it last night. I was totally freaked out about the possibility that there would be no one I knew at camp today, and you missed all the signs. Instead you just got frustrated and angry and downright mean.

But, lucky for you, I'm a forgiving kind of guy. Tonight was much better. Let's hold a good thought for Tuesday, shall we?

(Okay, Mommy, you can have your blog back now.)